One day a very interesting conversation took place between two Yankees.
“Did you hear, Mr. Blitz, that they manufacture nutmeg machines in Nantucket?”
- Yes? How do they do it?
- Very simple. They put the whole tree into the machine, then turn the handle - trunk! - and instead of a barrel, the machine throws out bacon, ham and smoked tongues. And instead of branches and thick twigs there are wooden clocks and nutmeg. The rest is processed into cucumber seeds, laxative pills, ladies' hats and more.
- Not a bad machine!
- Yes, it’s worth it, but it still can’t be compared with Atlantis!
- What is Atlantis?
— A machine for eating Atlantic herring.
- How?
- Very simple. You insert the machine into your mouth, put an Atlantic herring into the funnel of the machine, turn the handle - trunk! - the pulp goes into your stomach, and the bones are thrown out. True, I almost went to the next world because of this “Atlantis”.
- How is this?
- Yes, you see, I’m left-handed. Well, I put the machine in my mouth, turned the handle, but in the wrong direction, because I used my left hand. Well, the bones got stuck in my throat, and the pulp jumped out. After that, everyone shied away from me for a long time.
- Why?
- They took him for a skeleton. The machine threw out all the meat, leaving me only skin and bones. Probably for a month, if not more, everyone took me for a living skeleton.
- Yes, I always said that the Yankees are inventive people.
Translated from Russian · original on wisdomlib.ru