Whether it happened or not, they say that in former times there lived a husband and wife. The wife was hard-working and diligent, and the husband was lazy and a slacker. Because of his laziness, they constantly quarreled. Finally the wife could not stand it and said to her husband:
- Listen, hubby, this is no good. Why do you sit in your room from early morning until late at night, do nothing, never go outside and breathe fresh air?
“I have nothing to do on the street,” answered the husband. “My father left an inheritance: bulls, cows, sheep.” The shepherds bring me milk, wool and money, and you and I live comfortably. And all the housework - cooking, washing, sewing, spinning - must be done by you.
- Should I give water to that calf that is standing in the stable? - asked the wife. “I won’t do this again.” If you want, you can give him water yourself!
- Why did I bring you to my house?
“You brought me so that I could do everything around the house and take care of you, and not so that I could also water the calf.”
- No, I brought you here so that you would do everything I tell you, and as soon as I call you, you would immediately be right there. Even if I order you to jump from the roof, you must obey; No wonder there is a saying: “A husband is a little god for his wife.” Whatever the husband orders, the wife must do willingly.
- No, this will never happen! - answered the wife. So they argued over the calf and in the end decided that today the wife would give him water for the last time, but tomorrow the one who spoke first would give the calf a drink.
The next day the wife woke up early in the morning, made the bed, swept the yard, prepared breakfast, but did not say a word. The husband also stood up. Seeing that his wife had done everything, he had breakfast, but also said nothing. The wife was afraid that, staying at home with her husband, she would involuntarily say something; she put on her veil and went to her neighbor’s, but did not close the door.
Let's leave the wife and return to the husband.
After his wife left, the husband sat down on the threshold of the house. At this time, a beggar came and asked for a piece of bread or a coin. But no matter how much he asked, there was no answer. The beggar in the name of God began to ask for alms again. He sees that the owner is alive and well, looks at him, but does not answer.
Then the beggar decided that the owner of the house was deaf. And he muttered to himself:
“My wife deliberately set this up to make me talk; and if I start talking, she will come and say: “Hurry, go and water the calf!” Even if the earth flies up and the sky falls to the ground, I won’t say a word!
Having not received an answer from the owner, the beggar entered the house, put his bag on the floor, collected all the cakes and cheese that he found, put them in the bag and moved on. The husband saw all this, but did not say a word: he was afraid that he would have to water the calf.
The beggar left. Soon after he left, the barber came. He saw a man sitting near the house and asked:
- Do you want me to shave your head and beard? The husband did not answer him. The barber thought: “If he didn’t want to, he would say something; that means he wants to.” He came up, raised a mirror to his husband’s face and said:
- Do you want me to shave your beard and curl your hair?
The husband again did not answer.
The barber sharpened the razor and shaved off the husband's beard, leaving his face as bare as the palm of his hand; then he curled his locks, extended his hand and asked for a reward. The husband didn’t say anything here either.
The barber asked for payment again and again, but again heard nothing in response. Then he said:
- Don't pretend to be deaf. Give me what I deserve for my work.
The husband again did not answer. The barber reached into his pocket, took out money, took it for himself and left.
Before he could leave the house, a woman appeared selling rubbing oils. Seeing a shaven man, she rouged him, whitened him and left.
At this time a thief passed by. He sees: a woman in a man’s dress, rouged and whitened, sitting on the threshold of the house. The thief came closer and asked:
- Dear Khanum (Mrs.), why did you open the door wide and sit without a veil? Why did you cut your braids?
The husband did not answer.
The thief came closer and saw: this is not a woman, but a chip husband, on whom someone was playing a joke. The thief hit him twice on the head.
- May you disappear! Why don't you answer?
And the husband thought again: “I know, my wife sent you here to make me talk and so that I can water the calf starting tomorrow. But I’m not one of those who can be tricked!”
Seeing that there was no answer to his words and slaps, the thief entered the house, searched everything around, took all the valuable and light things, put them in his bag, put it on his back and left.
Now listen to the calf.
The unfortunate calf in the barn almost died of thirst. He opened the door with his horns, ran out into the middle of the yard and began to moo.
The husband thought: “This cunning woman taught the calf to moo and make me say something. Since I didn’t say anything to anyone, I won’t say anything to the calf.”
At this time, the wife returned home and saw a calf in the middle of the yard. The calf rushed to her and began to ask for a drink. And then suddenly the wife noticed her husband. But she didn’t recognize him and thought that the husband had brought a second wife. Coming closer, she asked:
- Hey woman, what are you doing here?
Then the husband rejoiced and shouted:
- Lost! Lost! Go quickly and water the calf!
When the wife realized that the man with the shaved beard and whitened and rouged face was her husband, she was amazed and shouted:
- Ashes on your head! What have you done to yourself?! Who did your makeup? Who shaved your beard?
She hit him twice on the head, gave the calf something to drink, entered the house and saw that all the chests were open and empty. Then she realized that thieves had come and taken away all their property.
- Are you dead or asleep?! Why couldn't you vote?! - she attacked her husband.
“I did not die or sleep,” answered the husband, “but I knew that it was you who sent them to me, so that they would come and force me to speak.” Then I would inevitably have to water the calf.
- Ashes on your head, stubborn man! - the wife shouted. “You have lost all your property and honor because of stubbornness and now you are glad that you don’t have to water the calf!” Tell me, how long ago did the thief leave and in which direction?
“He left about half an hour ago, but I didn’t notice in which direction.”
The wife went to catch up with the thief. The calf is behind her.
On the street she asked the children playing:
“Did you see where the man with the knot on his back who came out of this house went?”
- How did you not see it? We saw it! He left the city.
The woman took the calf by the rope and also left the city.
After walking a little, she noticed that a man was walking ahead, similar in appearance to the thief who robbed their house. She quickened her pace, caught up with him and even got ahead of him a little.
Seeing a woman with a calf quickly pass by, the thief called out to her:
- Dear sister, where are you going?
“I’m a traveler, I’m hurrying to my city.”
- Why are you in such a hurry?
“Because I’m alone and I’m in a hurry to get to the caravanserai before dark, so as not to stay in the desert at night.” If I had a protector, I would go slower and would not torture myself and the calf.
“If you want, we’ll go together,” the thief suggested to the woman.
“Okay,” she agreed.
The two of them walked and started talking along the way. The woman was so affectionate that the thief asked:
- Dear sister, don’t you have a husband?
“If I had a husband, I wouldn’t be alone in the desert with this calf,” answered the woman.
So they walked, talking, and the thief invited the woman to become his wife. They decided that as soon as they got to the city, they would go to the kaziy (Kazyi - judge.), Determine the bride price and mahr (Mahr - money transferred by the groom to the bride in case of divorce.) and get married. Having sworn love to each other, they moved on.
Before sunset they came to a village. The thief said to the woman:
“It would be better if we go to spend the night at the headman’s house and say that we are husband and wife.”
“Very good,” the woman agreed. “But in reality,” she added immediately, “we will not be husband and wife.” This will become possible only after visiting the cathedral.
The thief agreed.
The headman received them well. After dinner they made up their bed. The thief lay down on one side of the room, the woman on the other. In the middle of the night, when the thief was snoring so loudly that he could be heard in the sky, the woman got up.
She went to the headman's barn, brought some flour and kneaded the batter; She put part of the dough in the thief's shoes, and part in the headman's shoes. Then she took the thief’s knapsack, took it out into the yard, took the calf out of the barn, put the knapsack on his back, left the yard and headed to her home.
The headman’s wife woke up from the knock on the door and woke up her husband:
“The door knocked,” she said, “get up and see that our guests don’t steal anything!”
The headman wanted to put on his shoes, but his feet got stuck in the dough. He took off his shoes and threw them into the yard, and walked barefoot to the door. Seeing that it was open, he looked into the room. Of his two guests, only the man remained.
- Hey, uncle! - the headman shouted.
The thief woke up.
- What's happened? he asked.
“Your wife ruined my shoes, opened the door and left.” Maybe she even took something away.
“No, she couldn’t steal anything,” answered the thief, “but sometimes she wanders at night.”
Then he saw that his knapsack had disappeared, and realized that the woman had taken it with her.
“It’s better that I follow her,” he said to the headman, “otherwise she might encounter robbers or vagabonds: they could take away her calf and sell her into slavery.”
The thief wanted to put on his shoes, but his feet got stuck in the dough. With great difficulty he got out of the house, cleaned his shoes, said goodbye to the headman and hit the road. While he was getting ready, the sun rose and the woman had already walked halfway. The thief set off after her.
Having walked halfway, he saw the fugitives from afar. The woman walked, turning back from time to time, and also saw the thief. She was very frightened and exclaimed:
- Oh, calf, it was because of you that all these misfortunes happened! If the thief catches up with us, he will kill me, and he will take you away, and you will never see me again even in your dreams. Be brave and hit your enemy in the stomach with your horns. Look, he's already caught up with us!
The woman removed the rope from the calf's neck. At this time the thief approached them. The calf ran and rammed its horns into the thief's stomach. He fell to the ground. The woman was delighted, began to kiss and caress the calf, and then went home with it. The sunlight had not yet faded in the sky and the stars had not yet twinkled when they both reached home.
Everything in the house was the same. The husband sat rouged and whitened and, as yesterday, remained silent.
Seeing the owner, the calf looked at the mistress and began to back away to hit him in the same way as he hit the thief. But the woman understood and held him back.
- No need, calf! - she shouted. “Even though he’s stubborn, he didn’t do anything dishonest.”
The calf lowered its head and went to its barn.
From that day on, the husband himself began to give the calf grass and water and did this until it grew up.
We went up - there was sky, we went down - it turned out to be earth. That's the whole fairy tale!
Translated from Russian · original on wisdomlib.ru