Two cheerful Yankees somehow ended up in the South, that is, wandered into the southern states, and found themselves stranded there. Therefore, they had no money left at all, they had nothing to pay for the hotel, there was nothing even to eat. And this is what they came up with.
We went to the printing house and ordered a bunch of invitation cards on credit. In them, city residents were invited to a one-of-a-kind spectacle:
Everyone, everyone, everyone!
Don't miss the lucky chance!
Tomorrow or never!
You can see a unique
Homo-ugrodus!
Hurry, hurry!
Adults admission 25 cents, children
And dogs are half price.
The owner of the menagerie happily gave up his “palace” made of rough planks to two friends for the day. And he even built a high platform instead of a stage and covered it with a heavy curtain.
And now the cherished day has come. The more dexterous of this worthy pair took upon himself the role of managing director and usher, while his other brother sinfully performed his intended role behind the curtain. He worked in the sweat of his brow: growled and roared in a voice that was not his own, threw chairs, rattled chains and so on, while curious spectators took their places in the hall.
Finally, everyone sat down, there was not a single empty seat left, there was nowhere for an apple to fall in the hall, as they like to say in such cases. Then the managing director, who was also an usher, closed the doors, solemnly walked through the entire hall, climbed onto the stage and disappeared behind the curtain.
And immediately loud screams, noise, bickering, howling, barking, and the clanging of iron were heard from the stage. Something heavy fell and a whip was heard. In a word, it became clear to the spectators in the hall that a fierce struggle was going on behind the heavy green curtain. From time to time, heart-rending words rushed from there:
-Hold him, Jim!.. Hit him on the head!.. That's it!.. No, no, not here!.. The audience heard everything and had fun. The children squealed with delight, the men hooted and whistled. Among all this noise and din, suddenly there was a voice:
- Call the owner! He'll break loose! Oh, hold him!..
And from under the curtain a disheveled Yankee usher emerged, without a hat, without a frock coat, in a torn shirt, and screamed in a voice that was not his own:
- Run, ladies and gentlemen! Homo-Urodus has broken free! Save the children!
What started here! It was as if oil had flowed from an empty well or a herd of wild mustangs had rushed through the city streets. Everyone rushed to the exit, women grabbed children, men worked with their elbows and fists, and in some places they even fought hand-to-hand. Screams, screams, threats!
And to this loud accompaniment, the Yankees quietly slipped away from the hall, and then away from the city.
When the unfortunate spectators finally found themselves in the refreshing air, they immediately came to their senses and woke up, and when they learned that the organizers of the unique spectacle had fled the city, they all understood - unfortunately, it was too late! -that they were cleverly tricked. Each to himself and together they all admitted to themselves that they had been fools.
Translated from Russian · original on wisdomlib.ru